Or: Another Reason I Loathe Politics
by Timm Frink - May 10, 2008
Knowledge of arugula is, apparently, all it takes to be labeled an elitist these days. That's the impression you'd get from the latest Newsweek, at least. Personally, I think Newsweek is a fairly hack publication, but one needs something to read on the can. So, lying on the floor next to the shitter is a Newsweek cover festooned with a photo of arugula, a photo of a pint of beer and a caption about "Obama's Bubba Gap". Yes folks, it's once more time to play the "Guess the Broadly Applied Stereotype" game!
Each presidential politicking season (read: all the fucking time), the charge of elitism gets hurled at one, if not all, Democratic nominee(s). Never at Republicans. This makes perfect sense, as the Republicans are the party of choice for evil, cigar smoking, fat cat oil baron corporate overlords of the military-industrial complex, who while away their days shipping American jobs to Mexico and India. They also use real, not clay, pigeons for skeet shooting off their 5000 ft. mega-yachts (ever wonder just why the homing pigeon went extinct?) and kill puppies for fun. Elitism is expected. Whereas Democrats are the champions of the downtrodden, the voiceless (literally and figuratively), the poor and harried single working moms who don't make enough tips waitressing and so have to work the coal mines at night, but still can't afford a damn canary. Democrats feed pigeons and adopt homeless puppies. Thus, they are expected to be Average Joes or Janes. Ideally, the Democratic nominee would have been homeless at some point in their life, if not currently. Democrats must "connect" with the salt of the earth, common Amercuns and woe be unto them should they fail to do so.
Therein lies the crux of the elitism charge: not poor or uneducated. Go back to the Newsweek article, claiming Obama has a "Bubba" gap. He may have been raised by a single mom and worked his way up through college and on to becoming a senator; but now he's lost his connection to the common bubba. Obama is a college boy, and we all know how those good, honest, hard-drinkin', hard-bowlin', high-school dropout yeoman farmers hate them some fancy book-larnin'. The gall of the man, discussing the price of arugula with a bunch of farmers! Farmers don't know what arugula is. Why, one might think he believed farmers grew crops and then sold them in order to earn their living. Midwestern Americans are stupid, after all, as well as the "common" man. They don't want a smart president (evidence: see Bush, George W.). The primary factor in determining presidential worth is whether or not one could have a beer with the candidate.
All of this is utter bullshit. Let's leave aside the offensive, derisive and dismissive nature of the "Bubba" label for a second, and investigate what in the holy hell this arugula equals elitism charge stems from. Yes, Obama did mention the price of arugula at Whole Foods while in Iowa. The flingers of elitism responded with glee, because there are no Whole Foods stores in Iowa! Elitist! Of course, there are also no Whole Foods stores in Vermont, which is entirely peopled by the sort of dirty hippies who would go there. There are also 178 farmer's markets in the state, meaning it's not that hard to get fresh produce. Point? None. Particularly if you think context plays any role in meaning. Obama was discussing crop prices with Iowan farmers, some of whom do, actually, grow arugula. Shocking, really, farmers in Iowa growing something other than corn. Might even be un-American. We'll have to look into this.
Behind the claim of elitism is the idea that, if one does not act like a stereotypical "common", one cannot understand their woe. Obama shops at Whole Foods and seems to not drink beer. Elitist. Clinton has been photographed drinking Heineken, the choice for people who don't actually drink beer but want others to think they know what a good beer is (read: Heineken tastes like boiled skunk cabbage, Christ, couldn't you even get a Sam Adams?). Thus, she connects with the commons. Nevermind that both, like 347% of all politicians, went to Ivy league schools. Frankly, it's bizarre. Obama is nigh a living, breathing, shiny embodiment of the prevailing American Mythos: "Anyone can grow up to be President". We all know it. Hard working, blue collar parent or parents, making sacrifices so their kid(s) can go to college, get a good job that doesn't give them the black lung and maybe even wind up a senator or president. Okay, so his mother wasn't blue collar, but she was a single mom. That still meshes with the American Mythos v2.3.2 (now in HD!). Apparently though, we all forgot the part where you still have to convey the image that you hang out in truck stops. If you don't act "common", you obviously cannot understand the dimwits that make up the bulk of our nation. That's the dark side to all these elitist charges. They only stick if you believe the majority of Americans are stupid, fat, anti-intellectual, lazy drunks. They only stick if you believe we should not be led by the best among us. We should applaud the prospect of an elite leader, for to stick with electing mundane minds will only further us towards a crumbling, decadent descent into insignificant mediocrity.
Timmothy Frink is a software developer and transplanted New Englander living in the DC Metro area. He blogs at This Page Intentionally Left Blank.